When popular Korean drama <My Lovely Sam-Soon> came on TV in Korea, it was a hit with many Korean single women in their 30s, as they can identify with the drama. The trend continued rising with the release of DalJa’s Spring, followed by a series of Korean drama that revolves around similar themes. The 30-something single women on TV are often seen as having a hard time with their love lives and living with society’s standards. So what are the reasons for women over the age of 30 in Korea finding it hard to get married?
In Korea, many women over the age of 30 are complaining about how hard it is to get married. It seems impossible to meet potential mates and it is even harder for their friends and family to introduce new guys. So where then, does the problem lie?
These women seems to fall into one of these three categories. The first category is the “survival” type where the woman is just contented to stay home managing household chores and taking care of the family. The second category is the “dependant” type where the woman is fully capable of taking care of herself but is looking for a man with a higher income so that she can have the privilege to decide if she should work after marriage. The third category is the “preserving” type where the woman has a high income and will only consider marriage if it does not interfere with her career.
Most Korean women belong to the second category, the “dependant” type, because they do not plan on taking care of themselves for the rest of their lives and so they will search for a man anxiously so that they can be taken care of.
However, accepting a guy with good financial background has its own disadvantages. If they meet a man with high income, they are afraid of degrading into the first category (the “survival” type), and only stay at home to do housework. Another issue that women worry is that if both parties are working, she will still have to do housework and take care of the kids.
It is really rare to find someone who can offer them the best of both worlds. With such a specific requirement, these women are having difficulties in finding their suitable partners. Perhaps a better way for this group of women who are looking for love is to get out of the “dependant” mindset and adopt the “coexist” mindset instead. Instead of focusing on material benefits, it will be more realistic to find suitable partners to “coexist” with as life companions, someone whom they can share their burdens with and do things together. The career/material aspect can always be planned out along the way after all.
Seri says
The problem with the “co-exist mindset” is that Korean men would not exactly cooperate. Korean men have unrealistic expectations, in that many want women to work and bring in income, yet at the same time take care of the children, household chores, and most of all… HIM.
So, when a Korean woman marries, her stress and work level goes up, her life expectancy goes down… and often her happiness, as well.
On the other hand, there is social pressure to marry and considerable stigma against single women.
Several women I know have opted out by leaving the country and marrying foreign men, who often tend to be more willing to split the domestic responsibilities.
Hebbie says
I guess, the best way to solve this problem is to let Korean women lower down their expectations as to have a good marriage life.
I understand the burdens of Korean women in doing all the household stuff, since I experienced it as well (though I am not a korean) but I goe married to a Korean man,
We, as women has the power to say what we wanted to say to our partners, explain to them that you need their help both financially and even in the house, If your partner loves you then He might as well, lower down his pride and help you household work..
nycfilmmaker says
This article is bs, perpetuating stereotypes. Categorizing women in general isn’t cool.
what? says
Yeah, because women are so diverse and dynamic creatures. they should be considered uniquely from everything else in the universe because they are so special. not.